Dear Hue:

Since you haven't sent me your cell number or email address yet, I'll have to use this Blog to advise you.  Get that info to me as soon as you can, though.

I heard some of your press conference, and of course liked everything you said.

Black Cloud and the permabashers won't believe you, because other coaches who failed said a lot of the same things.

You all sound alike to them, and your unique background and experience don't register with them.

You probably shouldn't have been so adamant about being here to win.  In about eight days, a bunch of people will be saying you promised to win the Division next year, or at least a 9-7 record.

Jimmy did all he could to help you, talking about a multi-year project.  I know that was horse-shit too, but you came dangerously close to exposing it as such to the ignorant masses.

You'll probably be okay, though.  After all, you have a lot of
 talent to work with.  Everybody thinks the only reason the defense sucked so bad last season was because the players weren't any good, so you'll get all kinds of extra credit for just sort of letting them play football instead of chess.

I could see by your grin, glance,and the way you thanked Jimmy for saying that multi-year project crap that you think it's kind of funny.

You need to be more careful.  If I could see it, one or two other people might have seen it too!

Anyway, you're the boss, and DeFilipo was a first year offensive coordinator, so I hope you just keep him.  He showed a lot of potential.  You've got to admit that with these receivers, these quarterbacks, and no running game for most of the season, he turned a sow's ear into a silk purse.

Unfortunately for Flip, he didn't read my blog until it was too late, and only ran to the left side.  In the last 3-4 games, it finally dawned on him that it was okay to run to the strong side, which screwed up opposing defenses who never saw it coming.  Then, they knew the Browns might run to either side, but that meant they couldn't flood left guard all the time and count on blowing everything up.

It takes Flip awhile, but eventually he learns.  You can help him a lot.

Better talk to Doug Dieken about the run-blocking scheme.  Flip changed it when he got here.  It didn't work, but he wouldn't undo it.  What worked best for these linemen was Shanahan's zone scheme.  It might even work better if you have to replace Mack with Erving.  Mack is more powerful, but Erving is a little more athletic.  Hope you can keep Mack.  I just don't think so.

What you gave up intra-season for Carson Palmer and his contract was too much, so I hope you learned from that.  I hope you let Sashi and Paul decide how much is too much to pay mercenaries.

After hearing you answer uncommonly good questions, I'm guessing that you really will investigate Johnny Manziel before confirming that he's an idiot and you need to get rid of him.  Good luck getting him to return your calls.

I know that several years ago you and Ron Jaworski really liked Colin Kaepernick.  I trust you've changed your mind, since if he can't get to his third read by now, he probably lacks the mental hardware to do it (no offense to Colin, who might be very smart.)

What about RGIII?  Well if Gruden couldn't use him, I know that's a bad sign.  But you know best.

I guess you might as well draft Goff.  I know you might like Lynch or Wentz too, but can you be sure they're not Kaepernicks or Griffins?  Goff is the only one who's proven he can do all the mental stuff, right?

You're going to love Josh McCown!  You don't have to start a rookie before he's ready with Josh around.  But you can't count on him not getting hurt.

Josh will help you a lot with the rookie.  He'll adopt him.  You also have Austin Davis.  You should keep him in a break glass in case of emergency box.  He doesn't suck.  

Now that you're here, I'm sure Joe Thomas will stick around.  Unless somebody makes Sashi and Paul an offer they can't refuse.  You have a good chance of keeping Mitchell Schwartze too.  He'll get some nice offers, but Sashi can probably afford him.

You seem smart enough to know that Terrelle Pryor will come to training camp ready to compete for a starting slot.  You have tape on his route-running, and four targets to look at.  You can see the nerves and inexperience, like you do in most rookie receivers (who were receivers in college).

I didn't see the first one he dropped, but I saw the nice deep catch he made, then the bad read/route he ran, then the one he tried to body-catch.  He got enough work in to digest during the off season...seems like he screwed up every way he could.

You can look forward to Josh Gordon, who already knows what he's doing.  With those two, Hartline, and a boatload of super quick smurfs, you can run any offense you want.

People will urge you to draft a "playmaking" wide receiver.  Try not to laugh.  You'll see: To them, anybody who didn't do it last week no longer exists, and anybody who hasn't done it yet never will.

You can do more with Pryor, of course.  Browns fans will "ooh" and "ahh" the first time he actually throws an actual pass out of the shotgun (or an end-around).

You won't have to draft any defensive linemen, but maybe an offensive lineman.

You know that the offense will have playmakers, but it's actually true that the defense doesn't.  Gipson makes plays, but is hurt all the time.

Try to land a stud linebacker or something.  Like Burfict, except human.  This will stun everybody.  You see, everybody here thinks that because you're an offensive coordinator, you'll use all your high picks on offensive players.

They will also expect you to run the exact same offensive system that you ran with the Bengals.

You need to talk to Isaiah Crowell.  Point at little Duke Johnson and tell him you he needs to be as tough as Duke.

You know, Duke is known for quickness and speed, but he also throws stiff-arms and fights for extra yards.

Crowell is very powerful, but trips over grass-blades.  You need to inform him that he is not the scat-back here.

Well that's all for now.  That should be enough to get you started until you get me your contact information.  Please remind Paul and Sashi to send theirs too.