Thursday, May 25, 2017

Cleveland Browns Derangement Syndrome

Hey, Mary Kay!  Why do you keep talking about Hue Jackson's offense as if it's a vertical/deep scheme?  Because Dalton went deep to Green sometimes?  You get your info from weekly highlights or something?

And what's this crap about Kessler's arm?  Oh yeah Hue Jackson publicly criticized him for not going deep enough last season.  You never asked yourself why he would do that, did you?

Why would he ask a quarterback to go deep if he didn't know he COULD go deep?  Is he just a bully, who likes humiliating guys with weak arms?  Or is he just a dumbass who doesn't know any better?

Look at Kessler's college scouting reports.  His arm is described as "adequate", "average", and occasionally "above average".  Hardly anybody said "below average".  Are they all clueless too?

Maybe, just maybe, Hue publicly said he wished Kessler would throw deep more to get him to throw deep more.  Wait--think about that, Mary Kay.

He wasn't talking to Kessler's arm.  He was talking to Kessler.  Why would he do that?

Is it starting to dawn on you yet?  Sigh...ok it's because Kessler was gunshy and didn't trust his receivers.  He wouldn't pull the trigger on time (before the receiver turned to look at him) because he was afraid the reciever wouldn't do what he was supposed to do.

It had nothing to do with his arm, and everything to do with fear and hesitation.  This is why Hue was on the kid.  

Now quit talking about Cody Kessler's arm as if Hue Jackson cares more about that than quick decisions and accuracy.  And quit talking about a coach who runs more West Coast than anything else as if he's a mad bomber.  And tell Terry and Tony to get their heads out too.

Here is some cognitively disonant Memorex Moron stuff from Bruce Murray and Maurice Jones-Drew on NFL Radio (Note: I respect Maurice and Ross Tucker a lot, but both are guilty of cognitive disonance sometimes, perhaps due to concussions):

Ask Maurice about the following players, and see what he would say:

Corey Coleman: Slot receiver quickness and speed in a wide receiver body.  Had to learn whole route tree as a rookie.  Should be lethal once he knows what he's doing.  Home run hitter.

Kenny Britt: Solid big fast veteran.  Good after the catch.  Legit deep threat.  Big target, good player.

Isaiah Crowell:  Very good running back.  Has really improved as a receiver.  Broke more tackles last year, seems stronger.  Better in zone blocking scheme.

Duke Johnson: Solid player, can play wide receiver.  Good player.

Seth DeValve: Mismatch guy.  Big wide receiver playing tight end.  Good hands, gets open.  Can get deep.  Good player.

Njoku: Can do everything OJ Howard does.  Really dangerous big play tight end.  Decent blocker, but needs work on that

That's six skill players.  In most cases, I've actually heard Maurice say these things about them.

So why does he say that if you want a quarterback to succeed, you've got to get him some help, and "it seems to me", the Browns haven't done that?  

The clinical term for this condition is "Browns Derangement Syndrome" ("BDS").  BDS sufferers are universally cognitively disonant.  

You see, the Browns have sucked for so long, it's imprinted, much like muscle memory, on the brain.  This is how guys like Ross and Maurice contradict themselves, without ever becoming aware of the contadiction. 

BDS is impervious to logic or reason.  Any argument against this pathology is regarded as "homerism", and through rationalization and self-deception dismissed as ingnorant and childish, without coscious thought.

A BDS sufferer could read the first part of this article, including the cognitive disonance part, without reconsidering their previous statements.

That's how bad it is.

Since the 2×4 treatment is now illegal, the only cure is winning.  The Browns don't need to win a lot of games.  Just a few.

Sentient BDS sufferers like Drew and Tucker will then review their entrenched pathologies, and resume conscious thought.

But Jeez...Bruce Murray took this to the wall:  He went into saying that most teams come up with at least one "helper" for a quarterback, whether it's a running back, tight end, or wide receiver, and excluded the Browns as an "outlier".

Ok so now Njoku, Coleman, Crowell etc all SUCK, OK?  I expected MJD to correct him, but he just agreed.

It's worse than I thought.  Maybe I shouldn't be surprised.  Half of America is clinicly insane.  Insane people don't know they're insane. The smarter ones are worse, because they think nobody else "gets it", and won't listen to reason.

Local BDS victims are worse yet, because they have been exposed to local media, and tend to be more attentive to team news.  While many have realized that things are changing (I never said the Browns fan base was mentally impaired), the hold-outs are worse than ever.

No Browns quarterback has a chance, because the offensive line sucks so bad, and he'll have nobody to throw to, and no running game.  Joe Haden is washed up.  Kessler has a "noodle" arm, and can't read defenses.  Kizer and Peppers were wasted picks.  Kenny Britt sucks.  So do both Colemans.  

Joe Thomas needs to shut up.  So does Terry Pluto.  Garrett will be a bust.  Same old Browns.  We're all gonna die.

Wow.  Just...wow.






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