Sunday, November 26, 2017

Irrational Pessimism and the Cleveland Browns

I come not to praise Black Cloud, but to bury him:

1: "I wouldn't get my hopes up" (about Josh Gordon's return next week making any difference).

...uh...what!?!  This guy made Brandon Weedon, Jason Campbell, and Brian Hoyer look like Joe Montana en route to setting several NFL records as the top receiver in the NFL in his second season...in 14 games!

And now Corey Coleman is back, and he, as the undisputed number one receiver, just duked it out with Ryan Fitzpatrick and gave better than he got!  

Called digression: Coleman is fiery and selfless: He takes blocking seriously, fights for every inch, and is fearless.  He has the mental makeup to be a great wide receiver...(once he stops dropping touchdown passes).  End of digression.

Gordon, with Coleman...won't make any difference?

2: "You could draft a clone of Tom Brady and he'd be a sports commentator in two years".

Well like I said, Black Cloud isn't really mentally impaired, but has to say stuff like this to piss me off.  He has succeeded.  So I must destroy him:

Black Cloud doesn't pay enough attention to know who to bash, so he just bashes everybody.  Kizer sucks, but so do all his running backs and recievers and blockers.  It's all his fault, and their fault.  And Hue Jackson and Sashi Brown's fault too.

Those sentient people who read this Blog remember how Randy Moss made Daunte Culpepper's carreer.  Tom Brady had him for a couple seasons. Moss did a nice job for him, but his stats weren't that great.

That's because Tom Brady has always used all of his receivers.  He dinks and dunks when he needs to, but first and foremost, he GETS RID OF THE DAMN BALL because he reads pressure and coverage before the snap, and knows where to throw it!

Brady, right from the beginning, was also all over his receivers when they screwed up in practice.  He was always like a coach, and the real coaches got out of his way.

Tom Brady makes average receivers look great.  When those receivers go somewhere else, they kinda disappear.

Randy Moss aside, he has never had anything like Gordon and Coleman at x and y.

Black Cloud:  Do the Green Bay Packers suck?  They sure seem to suck right now!  Is it remotely possible that they would suck less if Aaron Rodgers was still starting for them?

Leaving the smoking ruins of what used to be Black Cloud, everything is (unfortunately) coming together now for the Browns to blow the first overall pick by winning too many games.

DeShone Kizer actually is similar to Daunte Culpepper, and he's already synched up with Corey Coleman (and Duke Johnson, and even with Njoku).  Add Josh Gordon to this mix, and this could get bad.

Fortunately, Jimmy G might well be taking control of the Niners next week, and the Giants aren't as bad as they looked sans Sterling Shepherd (sp?)

Oh!  Oh! The Packers just returned a Big Ben interception for a touchdown!  But they still suck right?  An Aaron Rodgers clone couldn't save them right?

Sorry I gotta do that.  Black Cloud is relentless.  You gotta keep stomping him, because every hint of bad news brings him back.  Black Cloud is deathless, like a vampire.  He is poised to blame the Browns first win on referees and blind squirrels.

In the sunday night game, the backup quarterback just dumped off to the third string running back who took it 40 yards or so for a touchdown to take a 14-6 lead over the Stoolers.

I'm not sure how Black Cloud will interpret this.  He will try to find a way to say the Stoolers defense sucks and...

Oh excuse me!  The Steelers defense sucks and so does Big Ben what was I thinking?  Black Cloud doesn't care about the Packers, because he hates the Steelers first and foremost!

Therefore, the systematic march the Steelers are doing on the Packers is all the Packer's fault...including that touchdown and 2 point conversion they just scored!

For the rest of you:  I root for the Browns, but respect the enemy, give credit where credit is due, and think with my brain.

Josh Gordon might be the best wide receiver in the NFL.

Deal with it.

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