Sunday, May 13, 2007

Browns Forum: Coach Richard Hedd, Conrad Luczeonlieper, and Coach Joe Twelve Pack

Conrad: Topic number one is, of course, Brady Quinn. During the recent rookie minicamp, Quinn threw several ducks. To make this worse, he made excuses for it, pointing an accusing finger at one of the coaches, implying that he was being forced to practice differently, throwing into the wind. Should the Browns cut their losses now, and release him unsigned, or sign him and then seek a trade?

Joe: I think they should sign him and then try to get at least a third round pick for him. Or a second rounder in '09.

Richard: Maybe they could sign him and then trade for a right guard.

Joe: But they might be able to fix his mechanics.

Conrad: Possibly, but it would take several years. As it is, he needs to sit on the bench for a couple years anyway, which makes him a bust.

Richard: But we have a much more urgent need at right guard. A gaping hole through which entire defenses will pour into the backfield. No quarterback will stand a chance, so the point is really moot.

Joe: I thought McKinney was healthy, and a pretty good player.

Conrad: He is undersized--only slightly over 300 lbs. And his spinal injury will render him even more useless. I doubt that he can even lift or turn his head.

Richard: There you go! And there's no one behind him, unless you count that tackle they drafted last season!

Conrad: Right! Another project who will need several years to make a position change, if he ever does.

Joe: I heard they were also working him at tackle.

Conrad: Brilliant! Why not confuse the kid, too! He needs to eat, sleep, and breathe right guard for several years, and eventually become a back-up there. We just drafted a tackle! Obviously, they have no confidence in Joe Thomas. Makes sense, though, as he won't be ready to start until next season.

Joe: I think they might mean right tackle.

Conrad: I knew they were lying about Tucker coming back! There's your proof: Tucker is gone, and they're desperate for a right tackle!

Richard: I sure wish they wouldn't lie so much. We have to figure out everything for ourselves.

Conrad: Topic 2: How long before Eric Wright gets arrested?

Richard: I think he might make it through one season, and then get busted at a party. He's behaving himself temporarily.

Joe: You can't help being a hardened criminal. I think it's genetic. Bet he's in the hooscow before mincamp.

Conrad: Topic 3: The offensive line coach said that Joe Thomas didn't need to gain weight, when he's obviously too thin and weak. Should the coach be replaced now, or after the season?

ME: Ok I can't take this anymore. I'm sorry I started it. We're done here.

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