Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Ray O. Sunschein, Joe Twelvpak, and Wile E Coyote Post-Massacre Forum


Ray: No big deal. It was just preseason.
Joe: But they got mugged! Slaughtered! This is without a doubt the worst team in the NFL!
ME: Aren't you overreacting, just a tad?
Joe: You saw it! They totally dominated us right out of the gate!
ME: You mean after the first down to K2 and--
Joe: Techicalities!
ME: Accuracy.
Ray: The offense did start out well.
Joe: They all sucked! We're going 5-11!
Ray: But the Browns almost won! They rallied throughout the last three quarters!
ME: Second and third teamers.
Joe: Yeah, it doesn't mean a damn thing! The first team got butchered! Stomped!
ME: Actually, depth isn't irrelevant. It reflects developing talent, and continuity in case of injury. It by no means offsets the massacre of the first team--
Ray: But Rogers didn't even dress, and niether did Edwards!
ME: Nor did the Giants top three recievers, or Kiwanuka.
Joe: You're both in denial! This whole team is crap!
ME: No. The offensive and defensive lines got dominated. Absent a lead blocker, Lewis had nowhere to go. Anderson had no time and couldn't set. Manning had all day, and there was zero penetration.
Joe: Anderson sucks! Quinn should be starting!
ME: You're blaming Anderson for getting the crap kicked out of him two seconds after the snap?
Joe: He couldn't hit the broad side of a barn!
ME: All-arm off his back foot, falling down, in the grasp? What planet do you live on? He had some time vs. the Jets, and killed them. He did what he did in his first season as a starter, and in camp and vs. the Jets went short and to his left a ton better, and progressed--
Joe: Excuses, excuses!
Ray: Why are you both sounding like it's that bad? Probably, because they knew they were playing the Giants for real later, they were just sandbagging!
Joe: Yeah, yeah. No, what we saw was the real Browns, and they suck.
ME: Not possible. This was one of the most prolific offenses in the NFL last season. Thomas was a rookie, Anderson a first-year starter, and with Stallworth added. It's true that the Giants 4-3 humiliated the line--made them look like Girl Scouts. But they've been practicing against a 3-4, Hadnot was strafed in pass-protection, and the Giants blitzed a lot more than anybody expected...and they just might have the best front four in the NFL.
Joe: More excuses! You're such a homer!
ME: No, I'm objective. Four of the five line starters, this quarterback, running back, and tight end were 10-6 last season and among the scoring leaders.
Joe: But they only beat bad teams! They had a soft schedule!
ME: And several of the players are young and improving. The defensive line was upgraded wholesale. Chud's system was new, the safety tandem was new, and the offensive line was new.
Joe: A fat lot of good that did! The Giants ran all over them!
ME: No, they mostly passed. Wright got toasted once, and drew a stupid penalty--that was basicly two touchdowns. The Giants returned one all the way. That accounts for 21 points. And their defense scored another touchdown.
Joe: More rationalizing! You can make statistics say whatever you want them to say! And what about Wright? HE sucks!
ME: (Sigh) Second-year player, played well last season. If he's as good as he was the second half of his rookie season, he'll do fine. But he'll be better. Experience, see?
Ray: And he barely touched the guy on the interference call, plus he was supposed to have help on the touchdown!
ME: He was in man on a short field and he had inside position. There was no help, and he knew it. He looked into the backfield to make sure it wasn't a run, or a pass underneath him, or for the ball. He thought there wasn't room for Hixon to separate from him, and that he could afford to peek, and react to the ball in the air if neccessary. Only the ball was already in the air, and Hixon had accellerated to toward the corner. He miscalculated. It's that simple. And he interfered because he was guessing that the ball was there. The reciever probably fooled him by pretending he was getting ready to catch an imaginary ball--Wright got schooled. He'll learn from it, and be allright.
Joe: Oh, sure!
Ray: What about Steptoe?
Joe: He just got lucky. Besides, Quinn is a much better quarterback--
ME: That guy is one impressive little shrimp! I think he's made the team. He doesn't have Cribbs' top-end speed as a returner--I think they might have him return punts so that Cribbs can play on offense a little more. He's also a smurf reciever--way different than our skyscrapers. Guys who can cover them can't cover him--he's too quick and sudden. Great hands, too! Phil was smart to snag him.
Joe: But Travis Wilson was horrible!
ME: He never had a chance. Anderson was swamped. He got open--I saw that. Again, the offensive line was the culprit, for everything.
Joe: What about the fumbles and stuff?
ME: Inexcusable, but they won't continue. They were rattled. And Lewis did that--not Anderson, by the way. How often do you expect Jamal Lewis to fumble a handoff?
Joe: And was't that Adams hit and Wright catch and TD great?
Joe: Means nothing!
ME: Adams is the third safety, and will play in the nickel vs. some bigger slot guys. He came to the line as the QB was checking off, then backed up, then timed the blitze perfectly. He screwed up the blocking scheme--it was beautiful. Pool can do that too. That one mattered, they'll do it again. Even when a team game-plans for it, it can still work. They just don't know if he's in coverage or coming.
Joe: I've never heard such turtured logic in my life! This team sucks!
ME: You find it hard to think in detail, don't you?
Joe: That's right! Insult me when you can't come up with an intelligent argument!
Ray: Can't we all just...get---
Joe: Oh, shut up!
ME: Anyway, some individuals did well. Steptoe could mean more Cribbs in the offense, McDonald did great, Pool was good, Harrison...dammit they have to use that guy!
Joe: He can't block, and he's not an every-down back!
ME: He couldn't block as a rookie. He did better last season, and is better yet this season. He's improved as a reciever, he's 210 lbs. and can break tackles. You pegged him when they drafted him and had him buried under a headstone before the draft ended.
Ray: How about that backup fullback, Ali?
ME: Yeah, he did great. Should be able to get something good for him.
Ray: What?
ME: It's a two-tight end offense, and all of the tight ends can play fullback.
Ray: But he looked awesome!
ME: And all the scouts and GMs in the league agree, including several with spare cornerbacks and draft picks.
Anyway, I think they might keep Anderson out next week. You can't play with a cuncussion. I mean, they might give him a series, but I think Quinn might get his shot with the first team.
Joe: It's about time! And by the way, Ali is slow and sluggish. Nobody will want him.
Me: He's a 260-lb. blocking fullback. And Quinn won't do any better than Anderson did if he's swarmed under before he can even stop backpedalling. Thing is, he probably will do great, and then clowns like you will be saying "SEE! He's better!"
Joe: I am not a clown! But he IS better--except he can't throw deep.
Me: He did in college and he did last night. He takes what is there. If coverage is soft, he goes underneath it. If it's tight, he'll look to burn it. Anderson's arm is rare, and it's not fair to compare the two. Quinn on balance might indeed be the better quarterback, but Anderson fits the system a little better, and has already proven something.
At any rate, getting him reps with the first team is pretty important. All-in-all, this game was educational, and sets up some positive stuff. Like Steptoe making the roster, Quinn working with the first team, Wright learning not to gamble and guess so much, and both lines going back to the drawing board.
Joe: It won't do any good! They just suck!
Ray: Like I said, they were just sandbagging.
ME: They'll use the experience. Now they know how far they have to go to match up with the elites. And Pittsburgh isn't any closer to these guys than the Bowns are, except in their imaginations.
Joe: Pitt will murder us!
ME: How much money you got?

No comments: